Spiritual Mommas
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Spiritual Mommas
Somatic Therapies and How Can We Use Them in Our Spiritual Journey.
Summary
In this episode of the Spiritual Mamas podcast, hosts Aericka Khongdy and Kimaira Bernardini discuss the challenges of returning to routine after a vacation, the overwhelming nature of daily responsibilities, and the importance of somatic therapies in healing trauma. They explore various types of somatic therapies, the mind-body connection, and the role of community support in mental health. The conversation emphasizes the significance of emotions as information and the need to connect with one's intuition for better self-awareness and healing.
Link for information on Somatic therapies
https://www.verywellhealth.com/somatic-trauma-therapy-5218970#toc-types-of-somatic-trauma-therapy:
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Aericka Khongdy (00:01)
Hello.
Kimaira Bernardini (00:03)
Hi, welcome back. And I'm Kim.
Aericka Khongdy (00:05)
I'm Erica.
And this is spiritual mama's podcast.
Kimaira Bernardini (00:11)
Thanks for joining us. How you feeling today, Erica?
Aericka Khongdy (00:13)
Yes.
Feel better than I did last week last week. I was a little bit discombobbled. I don't know why Honestly since I went on vacation the beginning of December. I've been I Just cannot like reincorporate. I don't know why It's been a little bit all over the place. But this week I felt better than I did last week, so I Started working out again for the first time in like
Kimaira Bernardini (00:26)
Mm-hmm.
Good.
Aericka Khongdy (00:46)
I started two weeks ago for the first time in a while. So I'm sore and I'm tired, but I feel good. I'm happy about that.
Kimaira Bernardini (00:49)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, those are like the big things I think sometimes. I don't know why, but sometimes when you go like on a vacation, it can be a struggle to get back to your day to day and into routines. And you went at the beginning of December and then there was the holidays and that like threw everything off. So I get that.
Aericka Khongdy (01:13)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Sorry, I'm trying not to sneeze right now. Anyway, yeah, so that, don't know. I don't know. I'm hoping that I can just kind of get myself together. You know, honestly, I've been feeling a little bit overwhelmed with the amount of like stuff I'm trying to incorporate in my day-to-day practices. like, you know, there's...
Kimaira Bernardini (01:40)
Mm-hmm.
Aericka Khongdy (01:45)
the meditation, there's the affirmations, I'm trying to journey, I'm trying to do all, you know what I mean? I'm trying to work out, I'm trying to keep the house clean, you know, just like I'm feeling a little bit overwhelmed when it comes to that sort of stuff. It's like, how am I supposed to kind of incorporate all this stuff? And honestly, it's like, I feel like this stuff's not huge, like it shouldn't be that big of a deal, and I have enough time. It's a matter of...
Kimaira Bernardini (01:52)
Yeah.
Yeah.
Aericka Khongdy (02:15)
using that time appropriately and it's almost like I have too much time so therefore I am not allocating it correctly. I don't know.
Kimaira Bernardini (02:18)
Mm-hmm.
I could see that. think we talk about all the time, like doing things that make sense for you and trying to make it fit for you. And I think that's probably a piece that needs to be considered is because all of the things that you're describing aren't in themselves a lot. The journaling, the meditation, all of it is it's not a lot on its own, but they do require focused energy.
Aericka Khongdy (02:45)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (02:54)
for
you to do them. So if you were to maybe rearrange how you're doing them, so that like, okay, if I do for me personally, if I'm going to exercise that depending on what exercise I'm doing, it's either going to leave me drained, or it's going to leave me energized. So if I'm going to be drained after that, then I'd rather do it at the end of the day so that I can go straight into bed. Whereas if it's going to leave me energized, then I'd rather do it earlier in the day so that I can then go about my day.
Aericka Khongdy (03:03)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm. Right.
Right.
Kimaira Bernardini (03:24)
And the same with anything else. If I'm, you know that I struggle with meditation. But if I'm, actually, I was listening to the meditation that you put up and I was like, wow, this is like a refreshing type of meditation. So I was like, okay, this is something that I want to listen to earlier in the day. Like keep me going for the day. And I was going to mention that to you, I think.
Aericka Khongdy (03:33)
okay.
good.
Kimaira Bernardini (03:49)
having some options where it's like, sometimes you're going to meditate and it's going to be like, okay, that was a lot and I need to like process and I need to not do something after, or that was relaxing and unwinding and I just want to hang out and chill, or that was super refreshing and energizing and so I went going. So I think that maybe rearranging some of those things to make more sense for your day.
Aericka Khongdy (03:55)
Mm-hmm.
Right.
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Yeah. Cause like Sundays, I know my Sundays because I grocery shop and meal prep and that's literally all I do that day.
Kimaira Bernardini (04:22)
Mm-hmm.
Aericka Khongdy (04:25)
I feel like I did a little bit better this week. just, I don't know. I have to just kind of look at it and see what I have to do. Cause I enjoy doing all those things. And when I do it all, I do feel good. but I think again, just coming in from December, just kind of messed me up. I, I still kind of trying to come back in from that. So we'll see. We'll see. How about you?
Kimaira Bernardini (04:30)
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah. Yep.
feeling good. I'm feeling really good. I think I don't put as much energy into doing everything. I will pick and choose. Like there are some days that I don't do card pulls. There are some days that I don't journal. There are some days that's not super frequent. Actually, I journal almost every day. But if I'm like really just not today that I don't have it, then I won't do it. There are some days that I don't exercise. are some days that I don't whatever. And I may do other things.
Aericka Khongdy (05:14)
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (05:22)
I always do something, but I don't always do everything. So that seems to work for me. I'm like, okay, what is it? And sometimes I just look at it and I'm like, what is it that I haven't done in a while that I could probably benefit from or, you know, if there's a specific situation that's coming up.
Aericka Khongdy (05:24)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, I mean, I feel like wasn't such like a good place before I vacation and while I was on vacation. And I don't know if I'm just like holding on to that. And it's like, okay, it's okay that you don't feel like that right now. And I'm just like, frustrated that I don't feel that good. And it's like, well, I mean, life ebbs and flows, but I'm also like, but I felt so good, you know, so
Kimaira Bernardini (05:46)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah. Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
There's also, I think, something to that when life is gonna happen, there's gonna be ups and downs. It's not gonna be 100 % good all the time. to be able to acknowledge that and just give yourself the space if that's what you need, you're on a path of resetting and let yourself do it however it looks is okay.
Aericka Khongdy (06:14)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, yeah, to be continued. I'll let you know. I'll let you know how it's been going.
Kimaira Bernardini (06:34)
Yeah. Yeah, definitely. I
have been feeling really good overall. Actually, I wanted to mention, so we did a card pull for Saturday Post. And by the time that this episode comes out, it'll have been a couple weeks ago, but it was our first card pull. I wasn't sure which deck to go through, and I have three of them. So I did all three, and they all gave me the same message.
Aericka Khongdy (06:45)
Mm-hmm. Yeah, which was awesome.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
What?
Kimaira Bernardini (07:03)
And they're three very
different decks. So that's why I chose the one I chose because I was like, they're all giving me the same message. So we're going to go with that. But it was very interesting to see.
Aericka Khongdy (07:07)
Okay.
Okay.
That is very interesting to see. I love it.
Kimaira Bernardini (07:18)
Mm hmm. Yep.
Yep. was like, okay, I don't know. And I haven't done, you know, I do card polls for myself. I haven't done card polls for the general public or for other people. So I really was just trying to hone in on like, what is a message that I can share with others that they may need to hear and
Aericka Khongdy (07:27)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (07:45)
That's what came up across the board, so I was like, all right.
Aericka Khongdy (07:48)
Apparently somebody needed to hear that, whoever it was, whether it was the collective, whether it was somebody specific. There you go.
Kimaira Bernardini (07:51)
Yeah. Yeah.
I hope someone got something out of that. I did. was like, let's get back on track there. But yeah. So let's see how it goes over the week. Hopefully you continue to feel better and I hope I continue where I'm at because things are going okay right now.
Aericka Khongdy (08:00)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I liked it.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, absolutely.
Kimaira Bernardini (08:20)
Today we're gonna
get into somatic therapies. That's what we're gonna talk about. So buckle up, let's get ready.
Aericka Khongdy (08:27)
Yeah, which is cool. Yeah, I know nothing about this, so I'm
in for it. I'm here for it.
Kimaira Bernardini (08:36)
have you heard about like somatic therapies prior to like the past couple years?
Aericka Khongdy (08:44)
No. Well, I mean, I know somaticization. know it like somatic means, but I had never heard of it as like a thing until much more. Yeah, literally a couple of years, if that.
Kimaira Bernardini (08:51)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Yeah, I have been hearing about it the past like, couple years, like two, three years, as like this big thing. Which was really interesting, I think, and I guess I'll get into like why I think that's interesting. for those who don't know, so somatic refers to the body, the body distinct from the mind or spirit soul or anything else. And
Aericka Khongdy (09:06)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (09:29)
in somatic therapies, we're looking at your bodily sensations, your reactions, responses, things that could be happening physically for you. I think oftentimes we have multiple experiences at the same time, and we don't always differentiate. So for example, if I say I feel loved, I may be having a cognitive component going on of, you know, thoughts of
positivity or love or happiness, while also maybe having an unseen or unspoken spiritual connection with someone. And at the same time, having maybe some physical sensations, a sensation of warmth in my body, in my chest, around my heart. So all of those things can be happening at the same time. And for many people, we go through life without picking apart.
I'm thinking, I'm experiencing, I'm feeling. If it happens, we just kind of put it all together in one lump sum.
Aericka Khongdy (10:28)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, I mean, I feel like, excuse me, a lot of people are just going through life without really thinking. Yeah, like you said, picking apart, like, which I mean, should you on a regular basis? Probably not. But you know, sometimes there are feelings that you should and insensations you should see why you're having them.
Kimaira Bernardini (10:51)
Mm-hmm.
Mm hmm. It's kind of like driving on autopilot. You know, when you get in the car, if you're driving the same route every day, you're not always picking up on like, there's that person standing on the corner or that light is about to turn green or yellow or red or whatever, or this car is coming over here. Like, you kind of just go through it and your body will come back online when you need it to. In some cases. OK, I have to like slam on the brake really quickly. I'm back online.
Aericka Khongdy (11:20)
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (11:27)
But for the most part, it's just like, I just drove from point A to point B, how did I get here?
Aericka Khongdy (11:32)
Yes, Carolee, that happens a lot.
Kimaira Bernardini (11:34)
Mm hmm. Yes.
Our body functions that way, our brain functions that way in a very much like a computer system that kind of learns what it needs to learn and then puts it to the side and here we go. Let's just go through it without really thinking about it, which is, I guess, okay, to get through certain situations. But yeah, sometimes we want to be more aware of that. So
Aericka Khongdy (12:00)
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (12:01)
In psychology, somatic therapies are used mostly to address unresolved trauma, excessive stress, anxiety, chronic pain. That's a big one because pain, chronic pain, pain in general, can be a symptom of a mental health issue, or it can be its own thing that leads to mental health issues. Yeah, so that can be a big
Aericka Khongdy (12:20)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm. Okay, Max, so.
Kimaira Bernardini (12:29)
one that comes up and somatic therapies can be really useful in addressing those things. And the idea with these experiences is that they're so impactful that they kind of leave their own impression on our bodies, again, in a way that we may not recognize, may not be understanding of. So an example that I was thinking of is like, if I'm in a major car accident, personally, I've been in a couple car accidents, but
thankfully nothing major. But if I was in a major car accident, I may automatically tense up anytime I get into a car and I may not even realize it. Like my muscles may automatically start to contract. And that is what somatic therapy is trying to address. You're having these reactions or sensations that your body is associating with something.
Aericka Khongdy (12:59)
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (13:23)
And being able to heal from that, being able to address it specifically allows you to move through it and release it. And we've talked about releasing things. And when it comes to like energy connections, uncomfortable experiences, you don't want to hold on to those things. It takes its toll on your body physically. So.
Aericka Khongdy (13:47)
Mm-hmm. Yep.
Kimaira Bernardini (13:50)
The idea here is to start with some insight and recognition of what you're experiencing.
Aericka Khongdy (13:55)
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (13:57)
There are different types of somatic therapies. And this is not like a fully comprehensive list, but I'm just going to go through a couple of them. I will say though, before we get into some of these that EMDR is something that people use for processing trauma or healing from trauma and it can be very effective. There is an understanding that it can be its own.
somatic therapy, although it doesn't necessarily go in as deep as some of these other ones do. So I didn't put it on this list as a somatic therapy because it has more to do with just your eye movement and reprocessing in your brain than it does with your body.
thoughts.
Aericka Khongdy (14:54)
Yeah, I'm just thinking because I don't know enough about EMDR to like even know the question. I guess the question is like when you do EMDR, I thought that it was like it also brought up sensations, but you're not working on the sensations. You're just working on what your eyes are doing at the time to then fix that work on that. Excuse me.
Kimaira Bernardini (15:01)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
So I am not trained in EMDR and so I also am not super well versed, but from my understanding, yes, it can bring up those physical sensations. The idea there with EMDR is to contain them, to make them feel safer so that you're reprocessing them so that if that reaction does come up, you're not having the same response to it. And that is done through the eye movement and
Aericka Khongdy (15:44)
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (15:50)
bilateral stimulation. sometimes that could be with like, sometimes you'll hold something that vibrates. Sometimes you'll listen to things that are different sounds in each ear, something like that. It, I believe, and I could be totally wrong, that it is not as focused on the physical experiences. Because when you're reprocessing trauma, that could be a really big moment to be overwhelmed when that, you know, sensation comes up. So, so you want to be able to like contain it and
Aericka Khongdy (15:56)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Kimaira Bernardini (16:20)
and have that be much safer.
Aericka Khongdy (16:22)
Yeah, it sounds like almost like it disrupts like what you're saying, like the vibrations or like the eyes and the music, like the sounds. It sounds like it's like it's meant to kind of disrupt that, that feeling that, that, that thought process and then redirect it is kind of what it sounds like. So.
Kimaira Bernardini (16:29)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Yeah,
so EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing. And that's what's happening. You're reprocessing that you're disrupting the connection between this experience and your physical sensations and the memory. And then you're reprocessing it, containing it, putting it into something that's much safer.
Aericka Khongdy (16:50)
Mm Yeah, okay. So that makes sense. Mm hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Hmm,
I like that.
Kimaira Bernardini (17:11)
Yeah, no, it can be extremely helpful for people. Some of the things that I'm gonna talk about today as far as somatic therapies, and this is also part of the reason why I didn't include EMDR on this list, have less to do with talking. You don't necessarily have to verbalize or discuss the experience, and it has much more to do with how you're feeling.
Aericka Khongdy (17:34)
Okay.
Kimaira Bernardini (17:41)
like physically feeling the sensations that are coming up, that sort of thing. the one that's at the top of my list that I would love to get more information on and do some training on, but it's like it takes years to complete these trainings, somatic experiencing. So Dr. Peter Levine discovered this in the 70s and the
Aericka Khongdy (17:41)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (18:08)
I don't want to like go into too much detail on all of these because there can be so much. The overall idea is that you learn your body sensations and physical reactions and that allows you to begin to experience trauma or stress that may have gotten stuck. You start to approach that trauma and allow yourself to very slowly expose yourself to it. And again, this is all a body thing that's happening. So you're not.
Aericka Khongdy (18:36)
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (18:37)
talking through it. You don't necessarily have to be talking through it. But he discovered this by observing nature. And you and I have talked about how, one, how nature is like organically high vibes. And how there's this cycle that happens that's just very natural where, of course, it's natural. Of course, nature is natural. But
Aericka Khongdy (18:52)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, weird.
Kimaira Bernardini (19:07)
This cycle that happens where it's like, it doesn't matter if you're looking at seasons, doesn't matter if you're looking at animals, it doesn't matter if you're looking at landscapes, everything happens the way that it needs to. And if something is disrupted in that, it will find a way to replenish itself. It will find a way to get back to stable and homeostasis. So Dr. Levine was observing animals in nature and he understood that
any animal in nature has a constant threat of like death or trauma. Always. And yet you don't see animals in nature getting stuck in fight flight freeze responses. And while there may be differences in nervous systems and things like that, this is across the board whether you're looking at, you know, like a fish or you're looking at like a polar bear.
Aericka Khongdy (19:43)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (20:07)
So he was curious about that and realized that when you're looking at, you know, like the bigger animals or you're looking at animals that are in environments that are much more unsafe, the jungle or the Arctic or, you know, the desert, if an animal comes across something that is traumatic,
let's say that a cheetah is chasing a gazelle and the cheetah grabs the gazelle and is able to bite it and pull it down. And that gazelle then is able to get up and get away for whatever reason. They will all have a same reaction of shaking off the trauma. They will literally tremble or shake their bodies to release the trauma. And then they go about their day like nothing happened.
Aericka Khongdy (20:38)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, you see like dogs do that. You see cats do that. You know, like they'll literally like shake off an experience like, you know, okay, cool.
Kimaira Bernardini (21:03)
Yeah, let me just release
that real quick and keep it moving. So when he recognized this, he started to apply that idea to humans and started to work with humans on how do you release some of these things that you're experiencing. There's plenty of research on trauma and how it affects the body. And we often see that, you know, for some people, they can experience a trauma and keep going and it's not that big of a deal. It doesn't impact them the same way. So it's not that
Aericka Khongdy (21:06)
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (21:33)
the trauma always affects people in the same way. However, when it does affect people, we find that it can be stuck in their cells, in their DNA, in their body, make up some way, whether that is a reaction that they have or something that changes long-term. And generational trauma is a whole nother thing and we're not gonna really get into that today, but that can also happen where, you know, something can be so impactful that it affects people.
Aericka Khongdy (21:45)
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (22:02)
across the board.
Aericka Khongdy (22:03)
Yeah, so everything you're saying right now, it's very interesting. was read very, very similar from
He said the Dr. Dawkins that I had talked about in the vibration episode. And he talks about the same thing. And he was talking about how like the animals don't have this fight or flight. And so it doesn't stay in their bodies like long-term. Like if everything's conky dory and they're just eating some grass, they're just eating some grass. Like they're not thinking about like, you know, you know, I'm gonna die right this minute, you know. So,
Kimaira Bernardini (22:17)
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Aericka Khongdy (22:41)
And he was talking about how we have to...
not be on autopilot like you were talking about earlier, because then that's when our body just starts to just have these physical sensations that then make our mind have the fear or the trauma again, which then makes the body have the fear and the trauma again. So it's like this crazy cycle. So if we're able to not be on autopilot and pay attention to how we're feeling,
Kimaira Bernardini (22:51)
Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Aericka Khongdy (23:16)
as opposed to like what we're actually thinking, then we can control our destiny, our trajectory because we're able to then change it, because we're stopping that cycle. Because in the way he talks about in his book is that it talks about how the body, what does he say? It's like the body.
Kimaira Bernardini (23:20)
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Aericka Khongdy (23:47)
starts to take over the brain and then it's the pilot when it should not be. Our brain should be the pilot and when it becomes the opposite, that's when our vibration goes down. That's when we have poor trajectories. That's when we get stuck. That's when we're just like not moving forward with what we should, could or would.
Kimaira Bernardini (23:48)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Aericka Khongdy (24:15)
Because we're in that like body driven when it should be vine driven so
Kimaira Bernardini (24:19)
Yeah.
The interesting thing about about what we see with like when our brain gets in the way is that that's the thing that makes us different from animals in nature is that humans have a prefrontal cortex. So we think and thinking can be amazing. And it can be so helpful. But it can also be our problem. That's when we can't get out of our own way.
Aericka Khongdy (24:33)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Yep.
Mm-hmm. Right. Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (24:47)
we start to overthink that situation.
So I like the idea that like, okay, this has been flipped. And so we need to like get it back on track. However, I think that it's not so much at least in my own personal opinion, it's not so much that it just needs to be mind driven, but it needs to be a collaboration. And being able to recognize that, okay, because my body is going to do what it needs to do.
Aericka Khongdy (25:10)
Mm.
Kimaira Bernardini (25:17)
to keep me safe, but sometimes I get stuck. And sometimes I need to get out of that. And so I need my brain to do that, but I also need to be able to work those two things together.
Aericka Khongdy (25:26)
Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah, absolutely.
Kimaira Bernardini (25:28)
and it's, it's this process, like, Dr. Levine was recognizing all of this and being able to bring it back. That, that kind of, I think, really brought up somatic therapies as, front and center, but that was back in the 70s, like I said. And even then, or even now, or maybe until recently,
Aericka Khongdy (25:45)
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (25:53)
It's not something that everybody knows. It's not something that everybody looks to. It's not something that we all are like always on top of. You know, there's still a lot of miseducation or just not being educated on it. And people, for whatever reason, it could be any number of reasons, but people just not looking at like, okay, how am I functioning? My mind, body, my soul, my spirit, all of these things together.
Aericka Khongdy (26:00)
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (26:23)
in.
Aericka Khongdy (26:23)
Yeah,
to that, working as a primary care, I saw that a lot. was like people kind of have no notion of what their thinking can affect their body or can affect their outcomes or, you know, their body was doing this, so they felt this way. And it was like there's, there was a huge disconnect. And then when I would try to kind of explain, well, you know,
Kimaira Bernardini (26:37)
Yeah.
Aericka Khongdy (26:51)
you know, I don't feel good, I'm tired, I'm on this, that and the other, but they also were dealing with bad gut issues. It's like, well, yeah, your gut's doing this and it's not feeling well and you're putting a ton of energy into fixing the gut and combating the gut and whatever it is, then you're be tired and you're not gonna feel well and then you're gonna be starting to be depressed. And people would just look at me like, that's weird. You know what I mean? Like they just, the concept was just so foreign.
Kimaira Bernardini (26:56)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Aericka Khongdy (27:19)
And to me, it just always kind of made sense, but I just, don't know if that's just something I was always in tune to or grew up knowing. don't know why I understood that and knew that more, but I saw it all the time. Like people just, the disconnect between the mind and the body and the spirit is wide.
Kimaira Bernardini (27:39)
Yeah, that I was going to mention this a little bit later, but I'm going to bring it up now because you're you're talking about it. In the 40s, I believe this woman Gerda Boyason developed biodynamic psychotherapy and the idea behind this type of therapy, which is a somatic therapy, is using certain tools to get information of the body. So like
let me use a stethoscope to listen to what your body's doing. And then identifying the dysregulation, hey, it's not supposed to be doing this, but it is, so now let's try to regulate it. From a medical perspective, there can be a very big divide between how a provider might treat a certain symptom.
Aericka Khongdy (28:12)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (28:36)
or experience for a patient. And for me personally, I went to a provider once a couple years ago and had asked a question about treatment. Like, okay, is medicine the only way or can I do something else? And her response to me at the time was, I'm an allopathic physician and this is what the science tells us.
Aericka Khongdy (29:02)
Right. Yeah. Yeah. So again, having been like a provider in the medical field, there are very kind of different thought processes on that. It's certain providers will treat the problem, will treat the disease, will treat the symptom. And that's it. And I used to kind of explain how my thought process was, was you come to me,
Kimaira Bernardini (29:20)
Mm-hmm. Yep. Yep.
Aericka Khongdy (29:32)
with a stubbed toe and I say to you, why did you have a stubbed toe? Oh, cause I got up in the middle of the night and I stubbed my toe. Well, why are you up in the middle of the night? Well, because I had to pee. Well, why did you have to pee in the middle of the night? Cause I was drinking. Why are you drinking while I'm depressed? Do you know I mean? So now I'm not just treating your stubbed toe, I'm treating your depression. Do you know I mean? So whereas some providers would be like, you stubbed your toe. Okay, I'm going to give you this, that and the other for your stubbed toe. Bye.
Kimaira Bernardini (29:47)
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Aericka Khongdy (30:02)
not a wrong approach, nothing wrong with that, but it's just, it increases that disconnect like you were saying, like we were just talking about.
Kimaira Bernardini (30:04)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah,
yeah. So for me, her letting me know that, I mean, I was a little bit frustrated because that's not what I was looking for. But it was her letting me know like, hey, this is as far as I'm gonna go. And if you're looking for more than you need to search elsewhere, which was fine, because then I did. But yeah, there are some approaches. And I think I don't I don't know how this works in other parts of the world. I know that there are other parts of the world that
Aericka Khongdy (30:27)
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (30:42)
don't view it that way, where it's a very holistic approach. We need to look at everything. And it is maybe a little bit more of a Western mindset of, let me just look at the symptom or let me just look at the science or this perspective and not maybe take that wider approach. But it can be really helpful to take that wider approach. Just like you were mentioning that track that you followed for that stub toe.
Aericka Khongdy (30:44)
Right. Right.
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (31:09)
led you down a totally different path and it's like, there's a whole lot of things here that need to be addressed. And when we're looking at somatic therapies, sometimes that can be, you know, the thing that lets you know, there's a bigger picture that we need to be looking at. And that's, you know, that's gonna help us get to the healing. That's gonna help us get to the resolution long-term, which can be helpful. So.
Aericka Khongdy (31:13)
Right.
Mm-hmm. Yep.
Kimaira Bernardini (31:37)
Some of the other somatic therapies that I've accumulated here, sensory motor psychotherapy, so that was also developed in the 70s by Pat Ogden. And the goal for that approach is to regulate a dysregulated nervous system. We talked about, you know, how that functions, fight, flight, freeze, and how it can become dysregulated. It doesn't always, and it doesn't happen for everybody in every situation, but
Aericka Khongdy (32:02)
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (32:06)
know, if it is dysregulated, then how do we get back to homeostasis? The Hakomi method also developed in the 70s. There was something going on in the 70s. People were like, let's take a different approach. Yeah, it might have been that. It might have been that. That might have been like the connection of like, there's something else going on here. We need to be looking at it.
Aericka Khongdy (32:20)
think it was psychedelic drugs, but...
You
Kimaira Bernardini (32:33)
But the Hakomi method by Ron Kurtz focuses more on like mindfulness and just becoming aware. And I think that's the place that we all need to start with, somatic experiencing or somatic therapies or just being able to identify like what's going on. coming back to like the mindfulness that we've talked about in the past, this is more about how am I experiencing things. When
A client comes to me in therapy and you know, they're like, I feel angry. My first question is always like, how do you know you're angry? Like what lets you know that you're angry? And if they're saying things like, that just really pissed me off and they're not really telling me how they know they're angry, then there's work that I need to do on that end. But if they're telling me like, my body gets really hot when I'm angry, which a lot of people do feel
heat, heated literally when they're angry. That lets me know that you're paying attention a little bit to what's going on with you in certain situations. Can you tell me when you're happy? How do you know that you're happy? Can you tell me where you feel it in your body when you're confused, when you're upset, when you're sad? Those things are important. It lets you know what you can do about
Aericka Khongdy (33:31)
Mm-hmm. Yep. Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, more in tune. Yeah, because like emotions obviously we know are super important.
But I like that. I like that like, know where it is in your body and then we can work on that feeling. That kind of goes back to that.
feeling like your body being the driving force. So if we can kind of bring that back and bring that body back, okay, well, you got heated. Well, how do we not get heated in that situation? So yeah, I like that. That's an interesting approach. I like that.
Kimaira Bernardini (34:16)
Yeah. Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Right. Right.
Yeah, it's really helpful. I mean, it gives me information on them, whether or not they understand it, and it can also be helpful for them to figure out what comes next. And not that it's like, okay, if you know that when you're angry, your body gets hot, your body temperature rises. So if you do something about it, that means that you're never gonna be angry. That's not what I'm saying.
Aericka Khongdy (34:55)
No.
Right.
Kimaira Bernardini (34:58)
But it lets you know
like, hey, here are some tools that I could use to manage this situation better. Because when I'm angry, I tend to explode. And an explosion means that I'm yelling at the people that I care about, that I'm saying mean things that I don't actually feel or that don't really resonate with me, that I might be engaging in self harm by punching a wall or punching myself. There may be other things that, other consequences that happen.
Aericka Khongdy (35:08)
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (35:26)
And I don't want those things to happen. So how can I better manage that? It's not about never being angry, but being angry. Yes. Yeah. Right. Right. Yeah. The other thing that I say, you know, when I'm talking with people sometimes is like emotions themselves are not good or bad. They're just information.
Aericka Khongdy (35:30)
Right, yeah, because negative emotions are needed in situations. Them taking over, not necessarily needed in all situations.
Mmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (35:54)
emotions
themselves are letting you know how you're experiencing a situation. And if you're taking it from that perspective of like data points, okay, this is giving me information. So what do I do with this information now?
Aericka Khongdy (35:58)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, because now you have that information you do something about it. Yeah.
Kimaira Bernardini (36:07)
Yeah.
And sometimes doing something about it means doing nothing. Like, hey, I'm just going to sit with it, which is a really hard thing to do when the emotion that you're experiencing is uncomfortable. But that's a whole nother thing. Yeah, yeah, a whole nother thing altogether. But so sensory motor, the Hakomi method of that mindfulness and
Aericka Khongdy (36:13)
Exactly.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. It's all another story.
Kimaira Bernardini (36:35)
bioenergetic therapy, which is another type of somatic therapy, uses things like tapping. EFT is a tapping method where you can learn to associate tapping, you would tap on certain parts of your body, maybe you tap on your face. And as you do that, you're repeating a phrase, a mantra, a saying, an affirmation, and that is associating this sensation.
with that phrase, which then makes your body feel that experience. so eventually you don't necessarily have to say the phrase, you could just do the tapping or you could say the phrase without doing the tapping and have the same reaction. And then the last one that I'm going to talk about today is brain spotting. And so this is something that I was trained in and I find it to be...
Aericka Khongdy (37:09)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Kimaira Bernardini (37:36)
trying to choose my words carefully. I, in my personal experience doing brain spotting, not as a therapist but as a client, have found this to be kind of like transformational, like really insightful. I was putting things together that I didn't realize could be put together. When I think about my ideal meditative experience, this is what I wish it was.
Aericka Khongdy (37:38)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (38:04)
Because
Aericka Khongdy (38:04)
Okay.
Kimaira Bernardini (38:06)
when I go into brain spotting as a client, I can have that experience of like,
Seeing things in my mind's eye, which we've talked about, that looks different, I guess. But I can experience things and make connections in ways that's more difficult for me to do otherwise. Brainspotting was something that was discovered in the early 2000s by David Grand, and he was formally trained in EMDR. So he was doing EMDR with a person and was getting stuck. That person was just not making progress.
And he discovered brain spotting and was like, this is how we're going to go deeper. This is how we're going to release what you need to release. So you would use biolateral music, specific types of music, specific types of hurts, all of that stuff. And then go into a thought. Let's say I want to process this experience that was really anxiety inducing.
I'm going to start to think about that experience. And then we're going to find an eye position that correlates. The eye position is important because that allows you to connect with your sub cortex, which is where oftentimes we store these traumas, memories, anxieties, stresses. We experience them and kind of push them down and so they get stuck at that part of our brain.
Aericka Khongdy (39:28)
Mm-hmm.
How do you know where the eye spot correlates? Is it just like what naturally happens or is it something you pick? I don't know.
Kimaira Bernardini (39:42)
Yes.
So
as a therapist doing the brain spotting, I am looking for reflexes. Reflexes that the client may not be picking up on. They could be talking about it. So naturally we do this, right? And I'm kind of an anxious person, so I do this all the time. I don't like to like look in one area or make specific eye contact for long periods of time. But if I'm talking about something that's stressful, impactful in some way, I may look off.
Aericka Khongdy (40:00)
Mm.
Kimaira Bernardini (40:19)
to a certain area. So I'll let the client do what they're gonna do with their eyes naturally. But I noticed if there's any sort of reflexes going on, you're talking about this thing and that thing seems to be really stressful and you're looking off into the corner. And as you're looking off into the corner and talking about this thing, you're swallowing a lot or maybe your face is twitching or maybe you're doing a lot of blinking or maybe like there's small reflexes that can be happening.
Aericka Khongdy (40:40)
Mm.
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (40:48)
But when you talk about that same thing and you look off into the other corner, none of those reflexes are happening.
Aericka Khongdy (40:54)
Okay.
Kimaira Bernardini (40:55)
So let's go back to where the reflexes are and that will help us to kind of access that memory in your subcortical brain from that perspective.
Aericka Khongdy (40:58)
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (41:09)
And as you do this, so as I said before, like you don't necessarily have to do talking. The client doesn't have to talk for this. Maybe they're thinking about it and I'm noticing these reflexes happening.
Aericka Khongdy (41:16)
Mm-hmm.
So, sorry. So when you start, do you just say, okay, I guess you probably know what you're going to be talking, like the subject you're going be talking about initially, I guess. And then say, like, let's go back to that. Or do you say like, let's think about that? Like, what do you kind of say to prompt this to start?
Kimaira Bernardini (41:45)
Yeah.
So usually when I start these sessions, I am asking them if there's anything specific that they want to go into. Because we may have done a session last week, but they may not want to talk about that. They, what I've had happen quite a few times actually from people who are just like, maybe a little bit nervous about going back into these thoughts or experiences. They'll say something like, well, I don't really have anything specific.
Aericka Khongdy (41:57)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Kimaira Bernardini (42:14)
Let me just focus on the idea of anxiety or the idea of fear or the idea of whatever.
Aericka Khongdy (42:18)
Okay.
And then I'm sure it actually does bring them somewhere. Yeah. Yeah.
Kimaira Bernardini (42:23)
Yeah. Yeah. Yep. Almost always that happens.
So we can start anywhere and it's like, okay, that's what we're gonna do. Do you want to talk about it or not? So always giving that option. It doesn't have to be spoken. And then we go into when you're thinking about that. So when you're thinking about that anxiety, what are you noticing in your body? Do you notice that anything comes up? Is there any space specifically? Is it?
Aericka Khongdy (42:35)
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (42:52)
If you could describe it, what would that be like? You know, do you does it feel tight? Does it feel heavy? Does it feel I don't generally prompt with descriptors, I let them come up with whatever they come up with. And then I will probe for more information to get them to a place where they're really connected with it. And then let them sit with that. And we call this kind of like riding the wave, where
Aericka Khongdy (43:03)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Okay.
Kimaira Bernardini (43:23)
What can happen is, and this is not like happens every time, but what can happen is that a person will start, let's say here in the middle, and as they're processing and thinking, they start to escalate and it gets more more intense to a peak and then come back down. And they'll come back down to baseline. And usually after they've come back down, that's when they can verbalize like, something has shifted.
Aericka Khongdy (43:35)
Yeah.
Kimaira Bernardini (43:50)
I am no longer connected to that thing like I was before I walked in here. For some people this happens in a session, for some people this happens in multiple sessions, for some people this takes a really long time.
Aericka Khongdy (43:54)
Okay.
So what is like the brain spotting? So you said you're looking in a direction. Like, so what is supposed to be, is it just like holding that position or, okay. So when you see this, do you say, okay, hold that or, know, do you say something or just?
Kimaira Bernardini (44:09)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm. Yes.
So I am typically holding a pointer and I will hold the spot for them.
Aericka Khongdy (44:25)
Mm-hmm.
Okay, then they their eyes open, they're looking at it.
Kimaira Bernardini (44:30)
So their eyes can be open
and they can be looking at it. They can close their eyes. They can look away. They can do anything that they need to do. I am gonna hold that spot. This is where the energy of the room, and I've done this on telehealth and in person, and either way, me being there just holding that space, holding that energy for them can be helpful. So in person, we often recognize like, yeah, when I walk into a room, I can feel the energy or.
tension or whatever. That can also happen virtually if you're holding the space for that person. So I will hold the spot and they can keep their eyes on it. They can close their eyes. They can look away. They can shift. You know what? I don't want to think about this anymore. Let me think about something else. Okay, you let me know when you want me to stop holding the spot and I'll do that. But otherwise I'm here. And sometimes they've gone to a
Aericka Khongdy (45:07)
Mm-hmm.
Okay.
Kimaira Bernardini (45:27)
I've had people go to a place where they're like, I don't want to think about this, I'm going to think about something else. And then let me come back. And when they look at the spot, they're right back where they were, you know, a minute ago or wherever. So it can be a way but the idea with the brain spotting, like, yes, you have the spot, you have the eye position. But really, my job, along with holding that spot for them is
Aericka Khongdy (45:36)
Yeah, I could see that. That's interesting.
Kimaira Bernardini (45:53)
getting them to recognize what's happening internally, what's happening somatically. You notice this wave come up and you're reaching that peak, how does that feel in your body? And that's usually the most uncomfortable, the most unpleasant. And then you're coming back down. When you're coming back down, I want you to be very aware of what your body's experiencing because as much as we can recognize those uncomfortable moments or things that are stressful or traumatic,
Aericka Khongdy (45:57)
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (46:23)
we tend to overlook the neutrality or the positive. I can ask a person how it feels when they're angry, when they're sad, when they're upset, and they are much more likely to be able to identify those things than when they're happy. Where do you feel happiness in your body? Like, what are you talking about? don't know, I just know.
Aericka Khongdy (46:41)
Yep, yeah, we talked about that before.
Yeah.
Yeah. I mean, we talked, we talked about that in, you know, in the vibration, reason why I'm and, and that's where that visualization on like the gratitude and the, thankfulness and the focusing and meditating and affirming that
Kimaira Bernardini (47:03)
Mm-hmm.
Aericka Khongdy (47:11)
feeling of joy, like finding something that you remember being joyful and trying to use that sensation and focusing on that. And the more you do that, then the more you're gonna say, this is how I feel joy, you know? But you're right, is so, it's so much easier. It does something to your body that the negativity, yeah.
Kimaira Bernardini (47:24)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
From an evolut- evolutionary? I don't know why I can't speak today. From an evolutionary standpoint, the idea is if I know what discomfort feels like, then I can avoid it.
Aericka Khongdy (47:42)
Mm.
That makes sense.
Kimaira Bernardini (47:53)
but happiness we don't
always try to go towards. right, right, right.
Aericka Khongdy (47:57)
Yeah, because it's not scary. We don't have to anticipate happiness. Most
of what we're feeling is anticipation, like you said. So, and that's where anxiety is. So what is the saying? Living in the future is anxiety, living in the past is depression. So it's like, we have to kind of find that middle ground and not be worried about the past or worried about the future. Just everything is present. We can only control what's going on in the present.
Kimaira Bernardini (48:04)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Yeah, which is why, you know, like the mindfulness can be so helpful because you, it's not that you don't, that you want to like avoid them altogether, but you don't want them to take over. You want to be able to live in the present. You want to be able to, you know, focus on now and, and experience it fully. The other thing that can happen too, when we're not being mindful is that physiologically anyway, your body's response to anxiety can be very similar.
to excitement. And what happens is like, okay, I'm having like, my heart is racing right now where I have knots in my stomach, or, you know, I'm feeling very like restless and I can't sit still. Whether I'm anxious or excited, it could be the same thing. And what you don't want is those wires to get crossed. I want to know when I'm excited. I want to know when I'm anxious. I'm, you know, my stomach gets really tight when I'm anxious.
Aericka Khongdy (49:10)
Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (49:22)
but it also does when I'm sick. I don't want to get anxious every time I'm sick. So being able to like differentiate those things is really important. All of this is super helpful for like healing, for reprocessing, for addressing the experiences that we've had from a mental health perspective and being able to incorporate the body and the mind together. From a spiritual perspective, it is
Aericka Khongdy (49:24)
Right. Right.
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (49:51)
just as important and helpful. Whether you're choosing some of these therapies to engage with or doing things like yoga, breath work, tai chi, dancing, like anything like that, being very mindful while you're doing those things, it can be helpful because it allows us to connect more with ourselves. And when we're more connected and attuned with ourselves, then we're more connected and attuned with spirit, source, universe, energy.
Aericka Khongdy (50:01)
Mm-hmm.
Yep. I've seen a lot of like somatic yoga. Do you know anything about that? why, what?
Kimaira Bernardini (50:21)
each other.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
So I've, I don't know a ton about it, but from what I do know, the idea behind somatic yoga is to release energy that has been stored in certain parts of your body by doing these yoga poses. Sometimes like, okay, so for example, when I go to my workout class and we're doing yoga, our
focus is more on form. Let's make sure that we're holding the correct form. When you're doing something like somatic yoga, the focus is not so much on form and it's more on the energy centers. Where are you holding that trauma? Lots of times people experience trauma that is held in their hips, that is held in like their big joints. It could be like on my shoulder blades or along my back and things like that. And so
being able to do yoga and hold certain poses in those specific areas can help you to release. And I don't know if you've seen this, but I've seen videos where this happens, where people will be doing somatic yoga and just start sobbing.
Aericka Khongdy (51:46)
could believe it. Yeah, absolutely.
Kimaira Bernardini (51:50)
The, when you start to like tune into what your body is experiencing when you're holding those poses, the feeling, physical feeling that comes up can be overwhelming, sometimes in a positive way, sometimes in a very uncomfortable way, but being able to let yourself hone in on that and then release it can be extremely healing.
Aericka Khongdy (51:56)
you
Yeah, mean, your unprocessed feelings get processed somehow. And very often, if you're not allowing your brain to process them, then it goes into the body. There's actually a lot of research that, well, I shouldn't say a lot, but there's research that shows that a large population of people who have fibromyalgia have trauma, specifically,
Kimaira Bernardini (52:18)
Mm-hmm. Yep.
Yeah. Yeah.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Aericka Khongdy (52:42)
sexual trauma in their past. And there's a big correlation between fibromyalgia and that. Yeah.
Kimaira Bernardini (52:43)
Mm-hmm. Mm.
Yeah, your
body starts to hold on to these things. like, so in the moment when trauma is happening, and we, our nervous system is coming online of like, we need to decide right now what we're doing, fight, flight, freeze, fawn, whatever.
Aericka Khongdy (53:05)
Mm.
Kimaira Bernardini (53:07)
That escalation from incident to nervous system activation happens very, very, very quickly. That de-escalation needs to happen quickly too for us to like get back to homeostasis. But what that looks like is the stuffing of that trauma. For some people it's not, right? Some people don't have these traumatic experiences or responses. So they are...
Aericka Khongdy (53:28)
Yeah. Right.
Kimaira Bernardini (53:35)
releasing it in some way, but for others it's like let me just stuff it down real quick and move on. Well you're stuffing it, it's still there. You're not actually... yeah.
Aericka Khongdy (53:37)
Hmm.
Yeah, it's going somewhere. Yeah.
Yeah. Cause your body doesn't, it's not coming down, so to speak. It's just, so it keeps some sort of heightened level of something, anytime we know like physiologically, any heightened stretch stress causes that cortisol levels, that inflammation, that you name it, like it's happening. and so it just kind of keeps that heightened anxious state and it does pretty nasty stuff to your body.
Kimaira Bernardini (53:50)
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Aericka Khongdy (54:15)
I had a question. Why does it seem where some people will have, you could put two people that have the same traumatic event and some people will end up with the PTSD and like the semenization, you know, the fibromyalgia and some people don't. Do we know like, I'm sure there's studies, like,
Kimaira Bernardini (54:39)
Yeah.
Aericka Khongdy (54:43)
What has come out of that? Because I don't know.
Kimaira Bernardini (54:45)
Yeah, that's not a simple thing to answer. It's not straightforward. It's not like this one thing. There's a lot of things that go into that. When we have like the nurture versus nature debate, you know, there's pieces of that that go into it. What is your family history with trauma? Are there other experiences of trauma? In the way that you're describing it, what I'm thinking is like, for an example, like if two people
Aericka Khongdy (54:48)
No.
you
Kimaira Bernardini (55:15)
are in a bank and the bank gets robbed at gunpoint. Okay, so now we have this traumatic experience that's happening to both of these people in the same time at, you know, all factors are the same in that environment. But there's a whole history behind each of them that you have no idea what it is. So how do they handle stressful situations? What has their history been with trauma? What is their family history with trauma?
What do they do to process? Do they have support networks in place? Things like that. I am a huge proponent of community. And I've said that before, and I think that that plays a huge role in how we manage these situations and how we process these situations. If I have a lot of people in my corner that I can turn to for support, and I do,
turn to them for support spiritually, emotionally, mentally, physically, then I may be more likely to walk away from that experience and not have these traumatic responses coming up.
Aericka Khongdy (56:25)
Yeah, that makes sense. I mean, we saw it kind of on a large scale from the difference between the veterans that came back from World War II and the veterans that came back from the Vietnam War. Now, granted, they were both very different wars in general. But when the people came back from World War II, they were celebrated and they were heroes and like they were welcomed back and like they were given and there was like the
Kimaira Bernardini (56:38)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Aericka Khongdy (56:54)
people were getting houses and GI Bill and that whole thing. But people came back from Vietnam War, they were booed and they were seen as baby killers and they were, you know, like everybody turned against them and like they didn't get anything. And there was no support really of any kind. And so you see much more PTSD in those veterans. We're seeing now that actually we're kind of studying that that's
Kimaira Bernardini (57:07)
Mm-hmm.
Aericka Khongdy (57:21)
really kind of maybe not necessarily true. It's just that the people that came back from World War II were very different like mindset and they didn't, they call it shell shock. didn't call it like PTSD, but in general, if you look at the two kind of veterans classes, they said, you know, that they've researched that it actually is because of the support when they came back. So.
Kimaira Bernardini (57:29)
Yeah.
Yeah,
yeah, there's a lot of things that can go into it. mean, that's, like I said, I wholeheartedly believe that that's something that's necessary and something that we should all be, you know, reaching out for. It's not the only thing though. So looking at all the factors. Yeah, people can have very, they can have the same experience or be in the same experience.
Aericka Khongdy (57:59)
Yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely.
Kimaira Bernardini (58:09)
but have very different reactions to it or very different outcomes to it. And there's so many things that can go into that.
Aericka Khongdy (58:17)
Yeah, I mean, we talked before that like for myself personally, and I've seen in other people is like, you have a kind of depressive anxiety or traumatic event once and then you have a really long time between the next one. So you have time to like process that time to get through it, time to like forget about it, so to speak. And then something else happens. And then maybe that time something else happens, something else happens like in quick succession.
Kimaira Bernardini (58:27)
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Yeah. Yeah.
Aericka Khongdy (58:46)
your body doesn't have time to come down. It doesn't have time
to process. So then that's when it becomes a bigger snowball, a bigger problem to deal with.
Kimaira Bernardini (58:54)
Yeah. Yeah.
And when you look at something like that and look at it on a like societal level, I think about
people who don't have the opportunity to. Like, I'm gonna say something and it's going to sound not great and I don't mean it in a not great way, but I do mean it in a very real way. Some people don't have the ability, the privilege of being traumatized.
Aericka Khongdy (59:08)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm. No, that's true.
Kimaira Bernardini (59:33)
And that's because they have to continue to live. You have to keep going. So when my experience is always one thing after another, after another, after another, I have to keep going. I don't have the chance to even have reactions to this. And I think about that in like gang culture, people who...
Aericka Khongdy (59:35)
Mm-hmm. Yep.
Mm-hmm. Right.
Mm, yeah, very true.
Kimaira Bernardini (1:00:01)
who live in that world, that is their world all day, every day. You don't have the luxury of thinking about my feelings and whatever that comes with.
Aericka Khongdy (1:00:07)
Right.
Right.
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Very true. Very true.
Kimaira Bernardini (1:00:19)
It's a very individual thing that we experience, I think, when it comes to having these experiences and then translating that into processing or sharing or not. But on a physiological level, we can see what happens and we know the process that that takes and it will come up in some other way. So being able to just connect with that and find ways to release your experiences.
can be really helpful. I also think that on another level, not just like releasing traumas, but connecting with your intuition. If I know that...
Aericka Khongdy (1:00:49)
Yeah.
Yeah.
Hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (1:01:05)
that my body is giving me these sensations and I can describe that. If I walk into a room and there's two people standing in the corner and they're like silently whispering to each other and I can't hear them but my body is like sending me signals, my stomach is turning, I don't feel comfortable, I am more likely to recognize like hey maybe there's something going on over there, maybe there's an argument or something not well is happening over there.
Aericka Khongdy (1:01:34)
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (1:01:34)
if I can identify what I'm experiencing and verbalize it. You know, not just like, something feels off. No, this is what is telling me something is off. So being able to connect with your intuition that way.
Aericka Khongdy (1:01:45)
Right.
Definitely.
Super interesting.
Kimaira Bernardini (1:01:53)
Yeah, yeah. I think there's a lot of things that people can gain from being able to connect with this on a mental health level, on a physical level, and absolutely on a spiritual level. you know, like we talked about like yoga or breath work or mindfulness and things like that. I haven't done as much of a dive into this, but I would imagine that this can also be really helpful when people are trying to do like shadow work and
Aericka Khongdy (1:02:01)
Yeah, absolutely.
Kimaira Bernardini (1:02:22)
What is it that I need to release? How do I connect with that? Or how is that holding onto me or affecting me now?
Aericka Khongdy (1:02:23)
Mm-hmm. Yep. Yep.
Yeah, I mean, it goes back to the ability to connect to spirit, connect to your intuition. You have to be able to know what is your anxiety versus what is your intuition? Like what is, like you said, you're walking into a room and someone's whispering in the corner, is that my anxiety? Because I'm afraid they're talking about me or is that actually something? And to be able to work through those things.
Kimaira Bernardini (1:02:43)
Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Aericka Khongdy (1:02:57)
Yeah, absolutely. This is, this is great. on so many levels. Yeah. Awesome.
Kimaira Bernardini (1:03:04)
Yeah,
so we did a post at this point, it'll be a couple weeks ago, on our first Reset Friday and being able to like do a quick check-in with yourself. So if you find that you want to know more about, you know, your experiences, that's a great way to do it. It's like, take a moment, do a quick check-in. What am I experiencing in my body? Where is that? How could I describe it?
Aericka Khongdy (1:03:13)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Kimaira Bernardini (1:03:33)
what does it mean for me, just kind of like reflecting on those things and then making a decision on what to do with that information can help to continue to develop your connection with yourself.
Aericka Khongdy (1:03:45)
And if somebody wants to find someone that does brain spotting or is the somatic practices, is there, do you have like suggestions, links?
Kimaira Bernardini (1:03:54)
Yeah,
so we can put some links into the notes, but there is a specific website for brain spotting that you could go to. There's specific websites for somatic therapy, somatic yoga, you know, all of these things. But you can also just...
Do like a general search in your area for somatic practitioners or somatic therapies. You can look for specific types of somatic therapies and find resources available. I will say that it might be a little bit more difficult sometimes to find that, especially depending on your location and you know who's available. If that is the case though, YouTube. YouTube is amazing for some of these resources and being able to like...
Aericka Khongdy (1:04:33)
Yeah.
Yeah.
Kimaira Bernardini (1:04:46)
identify and apply some of the practices. There's also books. Like I mentioned, Dr. Peter Levine, who did the somatic experiencing, he wrote a book Healing Trauma. And in that book, he has I think 11 or 12 specific exercises that you can do to practice somatic experiencing. So that's also something that can be helpful.
Aericka Khongdy (1:04:50)
Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm.
Good. Very good. Well, this was super insightful, super informational. It was good. I love it.
Kimaira Bernardini (1:05:23)
Good. Yeah, hopefully
people can take some good information from this and we'll see how, you know, how the feedback goes. Let us know how you experience it when you're trying some of these things.
Aericka Khongdy (1:05:38)
Yep and then like and follow us and comment and follow us on Instagram and Facebook and look for the meditations and the resets and the journal prompts and all that jazz. So that'll be a weekly thing. So until next time.
Kimaira Bernardini (1:05:51)
Mm-hmm.
Talk to you soon. Bye.
Aericka Khongdy (1:06:00)
Bye bye.